I Have Gnats!

You know those pesky little critters that buzz around your head. I swat at them and they keep coming back! How can I get rid of these gnats?!

Gnats are small things I can handle, things I usually ignore like messy closets, a disorganized workspace, a crowded garage (more like a buzzard than a gnat at my house!), a car that needs tuning, niggling little things that require energy to swat at.

If I keep ignoring these annoying little gnats, they may bite me causing a lot of irritation and distraction. These gnats have become sufferings. A suffering is a big or chronic complaint that creates tension and crowds you. You are aware of how they diminish the quality of your life but accept them as normal because you don’t know what to do about them.

Are you identifying with me? Coaches call gnats and sufferings “Energy Drainers”.

What can we do?

Sit down and identify your personal gnats and sufferings. List as many as you can right now. Most gnats and sufferings come in the area of work and family/home. Start with these.

Count the cost. Anything you tolerate has a cost. The cost may be your own or others’ disappointment or it may be a loss of time spent doing something you love. One way you can count the cost is to ask yourself this question in regard to your gnats and sufferings

If I say yes to __________ I’m saying no to ____________.
If I say no to __________ I’m saying yes to ____________.

For instance, if I say yes to a cluttered, messy bedroom closet I am saying no to the sense of order and beauty that I value. I’m also saying no to time, because it takes me longer to find what I want.

Do something about each gnat and suffering if the cost is not worth it to you. Create a plan for eliminating each one completely. This might mean spending Saturday cleaning up the garage or setting a realistic completion date for a project that has been on your to do list for too long.

Some will disappear by themselves. Once you decide you will not tolerate gnats and sufferings anymore, some of them will just naturally disappear. Isn’t that awesome?

Neutralize them. In order to do this, your intention is to find a compromise, a solution that will work for now and that will take the emotional charge out of the situation like setting a realistic completion date for a project.

Convert them into learning opportunities or gratitudes. Some things like being the primary caregiver for an aging parent are unchangable facts in your life. Ask what you stand to gain from this experience. Arrange as much support as you can for yourself and acknowledge learning opportunities.

Update your list periodically. Add new energy drainers and eliminate those you have accomplished. Most of us have a few areas where they tend to collect. If you find they are at work, for example, take action! Do not let new ones accumulate or multiply there. One gnat attracts others – Soon you will have a swarm!

Coaching challenge: Go back over you list of energy drainers. Which are gnats and which are sufferings? Mark each with a ‘G’ or an ‘S’ to signify their magnitude.
Which can you address right away? Put a star by 2 that you will do something about within the next 2 days.

Eliminating energy drainers can result in more room to experience abundant life. That life is worth whatever it may cost me. Think about what you have to gain by saying no to the energy drainers in your life.

"Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters; and you who have no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost. Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy? Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and your soul will delight in the richest of fare. “ Isaiah 55:1,2

Excuse me while I go clean my bedroom closet.

Sincerely,
Cindy

A good portion of this article is drawn from “Swat the Gnats and Stop the Suffering” by Diane Menendez and Sherry Lowry. To see the complete article and more go to http://sideroad.com/seamless